a cure for the common cold...

Well, winter has decided to stop screwing around and show her ugly face in Missouri. Coincidentally, I also caught my first cold. After peeling myself off the couch I decided the only thing that would make me feel better was chicken noodle soup. When I'm sick, I pretty much consume my weight in chicken noodle soup... it's a family cure. I also dip peanut butter and jelly sandwiches in my chicken noodle soup (it's actually the only way I eat peanut butter and jelly). Please note, I've never claimed to be normal. Now, I KNEW it would be quicker, cheaper, and less painful to just buy a can of soup and go back to being a pathetic lump on the couch, but I'm too stubborn for that business. So, I mustered up enough strength to head to the store and get the ingredients I needed to MAKE soup.

Let's just note...I'm a baker. I mean, I can cook a mean meal, but baking is my comfort zone. I've never made soup from scratch, so I turned to the infallible Pioneer Woman to see what soups she had fixed up. So because you can never go wrong with Ree, do yourself a favor and when you catch your first cold this winter make this, love this, thank God for this, and heck, hook it up to an IV and absorb it... it's that wonderful.
*Just a few notes:
-for some odd reason my grocery store did not have white pepper anywhere, and I randomly found it in a pepper mill for some stupid amount of money (but I bought it anyway because I figure it'll last forever).
-even though I diced up my veggies real small and super uniform they took FOREVER to cook. I'd say I cooked them probably and extra 40 mins or so after eating the first bowl and realizing the veggies were still crunchy.
-also, I'd add more salt, and I'm not a salt person... but then again I'm also sick and my taste buds are WAY outtawhack.

Homemade Chicken and Noodles from The Pioneer Woman [try it with a PB&J :) ]

• 1 whole Cut Up Fryer Chicken
• 2 whole Carrots, Diced
• 2 stalks Celery, Diced
• ½ whole Medium Onion, Diced (optional)
• 1 teaspoon Salt
• ½ teaspoons Turmeric
• ¼ teaspoons White Pepper (more To Taste)
• ¼ teaspoons Ground Thyme
• 2 teaspoons Parsley Flakes
• 16 ounces, weight Frozen Reames "homemade" Egg Noodles (available in the frozen food section)
  
• 3 Tablespoons All-purpose Flour

Cover chicken in 4 quarts water. Bring to a boil, then reduce heat to low. Simmer for 30 minutes.

Remove chicken from pot with a slotted spoon. With two forks, remove as much meat from the bones as you can, slightly shredding meat in the process. Return bones to broth and simmer on low, covered, for 45 minutes.

Remove bones from broth with a slotted spoon, making sure to get any small bones that might have detached.

Add the carrots and celery (and onions, if using) to the pot, followed by the herbs and spices. Stir to combine and simmer for ten minutes to meld flavors.

Increase heat and add frozen egg noodles and chicken. Cook for 8 to 10 minutes.

Mix flour and a little water. Stir until smooth. Pour into soup, stir to combine, and simmer for another 5 minutes, or until broth thickens a bit. Test and adjust seasonings as needed.

Guns N Hoses...

The night before Thanksgiving is the biggest bar night of the year. I'm still not entirely sure why someone would encourage getting shwasted the night before a day of loud and lengthy family events, but hey I'm a team player. Each year the night before Thanksgiving, Saint Louis hosts the largest fundraiser of the year for law enforcement and fire fighters, called Guns N Hoses. Guns N Hoses is a charity event that puts local police officers and firefighters in the ring to box it out.

This event is HUGE, the best time, and raises TONS of money. Guns N Hoses is a benefit for the Backstoppers organization. Backstoppers is an organization that supports the families of fallen police officers, firemen, and EMTs that lose their lives in the line of duty. Those words makes me shudder, seeing that my brother, my best friend, and nearly everyone I know in Saint Louis are all police officers, and I pray to God I never know anyone that is a beneficiary of Backstopper funds. However, I will continue to contribute in support of those that do. Backstoppers is not an organization that cuts a check and calls it a day, they actively support the family of the fallen officer, and see that all of their needs are met. Backstoppers immediately pays $5,000 to the surviving family and continue to provide for them. Currently some of the things Backstoppers does:

• Pays the family’s mortgage, taxes and insurance
• Provides the family’s health and dental coverage
• Supports educational assistance
• Helps young people attend college

Please click on the link listed and check out what an incredible organization Backstoppers truly is, and if at all possible become a Backstopper and donate.

So what does all of this have to do with a food blog? Well, apart from the fact that I will do anything to support law enforcement, I also support making fun of law enforcement :) so as a way to poke fun and honor all of my favorite police officers, I made chocolate mustaches to hand out at the boxing match! I used a chocolate mustache mold from bakeitpretty. I also got chocolate melts from that website and Irish Creme flavoring, and it was so simply AND incredibly delicious! (I'm really smart and left my Nikon in Columbia, so I've been shooting my entire Thanksgiving break with my camera phone)

super excited my first mustache turned out!

my bestie and favorite lady cop with her stache!

she and I DRENCHED from our long walk to the car in the pouring awful cold rain. ick!

Guns N Hoses was a GREAT time as always. However, a lot of the essential team players were unable to attend because my brother and his squad were on midnights (they were working from 10:30 p.m. to 6:30 a.m.) so they were unable to partake in the festivities. That's alright, there's always next year!

"What the hell is that?"

"Get me a beer." -my brother
"What kind?" -me
"I don't care, Bud Light?" -my brother
"Really? I'll get you something awesome." -me

I walk up to the bar at Flamingo Bowl (in Saint Louis), and as I am about to order my brother a local brew (okay, technically Bud Light is a local brew too, but that does NOT count) I see a fancy drink menu, and I see the words, "Singapore Sling".

My heart stopped. I actually died for .5 seconds.Why? I'm glad you asked.
My E N T I R E life I have heard my father speak of this infamous "Singapore Sling". Legend has it my grandfather (who traveled a lot) had this drink while in Singapore and always raved about it (I think that's true, I could've just made that up over the years, but I'm fairly certain it's true haha!). My grandfather also had a bar in his basement so he was into booze, there are a lot of fabulously sketchy details about my Lithuanian grandfather that I love with every fiber of my being. Anyway, neither of my parents drink. They may have A drink, but I've never seen either intoxicated, so for my father to talk about a drink is a big deal. Hundreds of times throughout my life my family would be out to dinner and my dad would speak of this legendary drink, and we'd nag him to order one, and the bartender would always stare blankly. I have even witnessed bartending books being dusted off and brought out to see if such request could be fulfilled.
I place my order eagerly, "TWO Singapore Slings please"! I share my story with the bartender who was super pleasant considering I just ordered two of the most intricate and timely drinks to make. I come back with the two frilliest girly drinks on the planet (granted we in a bowling alley with all of my extremely tattooed friends) in the most feminine glassware possible.

"What the hell is that?" -my confused brother
"A SINGAPORE SLING!!!!" -me
both of our eyes were bright with excitement! my amazingly talented friend snapped this photo of the moment:I proceeded to attempt to call my father at 11 p.m. probably twenty times to share the excitement, and to my great disappointment, he never answered! Turd!!

Anyway, this drink WAS killer and boozey and... you couldn't taste any of the booze. E P I C.

This is from Flamingo Bowl's Cocktail Menu, check it out if you are ever in Saint Louis!! It's fabulous and in general Flamingo Bowl rules.
Singapore Sling / $9
Bombay Gin, Cointreau, Benedictine, cherry brandy, fresh juices, grenadine, bitters

This is normal, right?

This is not your typical holiday butter ball, right?
Oh, you don't find bowling balls baking in your oven?
Yeah, didn't think so.
Another reason I love my dad.

Yeast the B...

e a s t.

Yeast the beast. Yeast is scary. Am I right or am I right? Is my water hot enough to make it bubble? Is it suppose to bubble? Will it expand? Will it expand the first resting period and then psych you out like when the boy you like wants to talk to you, but only to ask you about your best friend? Oh man, yeast SUCKS. Truthfully, I'm not certain when yeast isn't scary. Yeast infections? SCARY (yeah I went there). Okay okay, yeast does ferment and gives us booze, so that's rad. Anyway, together and with the guidance from our good friend King Arthur let's get over the fear of yeast (at least in non anatomical settings) and eat some soft pretzels.

Hot Buttered Pretzels, from King Arthur Flour
What you will need:
• 2 1/2 cups Unbleached, All- Purpose Flour
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 2 1/4 teaspoon regular instant yeast
• 1 cup warm water

Topping:
• 1/2 cup warm water
• 2 Tablespoons baking soda
• 3 Tablespoons unsalted butter, melted

Now King Arthur gives you a few options including a food processor method, and a bread machine method, but we'll use their third option, the mixer. If you'd like to check out the other methods just click on that handy dandy link I posted above.

Let's do this:
-Place all of the dough ingredients into your mixing bowl. Knead the dough on medium high speed for about 5 minutes. It will pull away from the sides of the bowl, and form a bowl that is soft, smooth, and quite slack. Lightly flour the dough and place it in a greased bowl, cover it up, and allow it to rest for 30 minutes.

Preheat your oven to 500°F.

If you are like me you will stop and go, "500? Does my oven do that?!!" It most likely does, so just start preheating it!

Gather two baking sheets and prepare them by spraying them with vegetable oil spray, or lining them with parchment paper.

Transfer the dough to a lightly greased work surface, and divide it into eight equal pieces (about 70g, or 2 1/2 ounces, each). Allow the pieces to rest, uncovered, for 5 minutes. While the dough is resting, combine the 1/2 cup warm water and the baking soda, and place it in a shallow bowl. Make sure the baking soda is thoroughly dissolved; if it isn't, it'll make your pretzels splotchy.

Roll each piece of dough into a long, thin rope (about 28 to 30 inches long), and twist each rope into a pretzel, or whatever shape you can make. Dip each pretzel in the baking soda wash (this will give the pretzels a nice, golden-brown color), and place them on the baking sheets. Sprinkle them lightly with coarse, kosher, or pretzel salt. I actually sprinkled 3 of them with cinnamon and brown sugar to make a "sweet" pretzel. They turned out AWESOME. However, the excess burned in the 500 degree oven so it was a liiiittle smokey. Allow them to rest, uncovered, for 10 minutes.
**Also, my parchment paper almost caught on fire. The edges turned SUPER dark and started smoking... so keep an eye on that 500 degree oven. No soft pretzel is worth burning your home down... (okay, maybe some are, but seriously don't do it.)

Bake the pretzels for 8 to 9 minutes, or until they're golden brown, rotating the baking sheets halfway through.

Remove the pretzels from the oven, and drown them in melted butter. Keep brushing the butter on until you've used it all up; it may seem like a lot, but that's what gives these pretzels their glorious taste. Eat the pretzels warm, or if you somehow do not devour all of them at once, reheat them in an oven or microwave.

looking too good!!! right??

p.s. let's not talk about my "pretzel" shapes... my friend Dan said they looked like plastic dog poop. jerk.

The Real Deal Holyfield...

Sooooo, Hi. Sara T here. Remember me? Blond hair blue eyed baker... living it up in the land I love, Missouri. It's been a minute (or months) and for that I apologize. I've been... busy? Negligent? Reclusive? All of the above truthfully, and a little discouraged too. I faithfully read the food blogs of all my blogging crushes. I get recipes, ideas, inspiration, and often sincere feelings of inadequacy. Hey, I'm quirky. I'm fun. I cook like nobodies business... I need to step up my game!! I just wish this little blog of mine could be so much more. Well, I have a few things in the works, so look forward to that... because I definitely am!!
So what have I been doing? Sheesh. It seems as though every weekend I am playing hostess.

Do NOT get it twisted. I love and adore having visitors.
I love that my boyfriend throws the greatest parties on the planet that attract great friends from all over the country. I adore living in a college town that never ages.

(oh p.s. check out my talented and (ridiculously good looking) friends blog, it's amazing and where a lot of these photos come from)

So yeah, that's a bit about what I've been doing... What have you been doing?! Let me know!

But now, real talk. This post is all about French Buttercream. Do NOT get it confused with American Buttercream...filled with shortening and powdered sugar. Don't get me wrong... I've yet to meet a frosting I wouldn't eat, but this is... the Chanel of frosting. Yep, that's serious. This is the real deal. It spreads WAY smoother than American buttercream, and it's so super rich. Also, at work we make a crazy giant batch at the start of the week and flavor it as needed. You can make a huge batch of this (this recipe is not huge) and throw fresh fruit in it, espresso, chocolate, anything and it flavors super nicely. It stores best if you just wrap it up in little plastic wrap packets. It'll get super hard and then you just throw it back in your mixer (it'll look gross and watery and broken as it re-mixes, but will come back immaculately after it's beaten for a while on a high speed).

French Buttercream, from Professional Baking Fifth Edition.

8 oz Sugar
2 oz Water
3 oz Egg Yolks
10 oz Butter, softened
.12 oz (3/4 tsp) Vanilla extract

1. Combine the sugar and water in a heavy bottom saucepan. Bring to a boil while stirring to dissolve the sugar.

2. Continue to boil until the syrup reaches a temperature of 240 F. (This is NOT a typo. I am actually directing you to boil sugar and water until 240 F. Please I beg of you, try not to burn the fingerprints off your fingers... unless you are planning on embarking on a mass crime spree and want to go undetected, then just dunk those fingers right in!!).

3. While the syrup is boiling, beat the yolks with a wire whip or the whip attachment of a mixer until they are thick and light.

4. As soon as the syrup reaches 240 F pour it very slowly into the beaten yolks while whipping constantly.

5. Continue to beat until the mixture is completely cool and the yolks are very thick and light.

6. Whip in the butter a little at a time. Add it just as fast as it can be absorbed by the mixture.

7. Beat in the vanilla. If the icing is too soft, refrigerate it until it is firm enough to spread.

Then get a spoon (after licking the mixing bowl clean of course) and dive in. Close your eyes, name your dog Pierre, and thank God that even though Americans are way tougher and 1000 times cooler than the French will ever be (sarcasm, learn it love it embrace it), and rejoice in the fact that they have perfected both the art of pastry and making Americans fatter. I guess you could also bake a cake, and put the Buttercream on that, but only if you are going to trick your friends into eating it too.

Check this out, I put forth a very...half assed attempt to make a "ruffled cake", because Melody of the epically fabulous My Sweet and Saucy put up this stellar video of how to do so. It's SUPER simple and looks ultra fancy. Give it a whirl!!